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papetowe
03-25-2006, 08:02 AM
This was on meh xanga.

Yesterday I went onto someone else's yahoo e-mail account and started deleting all their mail.

Let me explain.

I went to the library, and I was waiting for this lady to get off the computer. Finally, she did, and I got up out of my seat, eyeballing another young man who was also getting up out of his. We both raced for it. I took out an exacto knife and slit his throat, and I accidentally ran into the woman.

She told me I was rude.

I told her to fuck herself.

She said she'd fuck herself if she had a full length mirror.

I said go away...and she did.

I sat down at the computer and pushed the dead kid's body under the heater because it was distracting me.

I get on Yahoo, click on MAIL, and it doesn't ask me for a password or anything. It gets me on the mail server right away. Of course, I've been rather brain dead lately, so I just assume my account is saved on there from TWO DAYS ago.

75 messages.

I was very surprised that I had 75 messages since this is a personal e-mail address and I don't give it to friends or anything.

Then again, if I gave it to friends, I only would have had 3 messages.

So I start rummaging through it. Most of it is from this place called LonelyVirgins and I delete it and I start getting really pissed. And the other half of the e-mails are from some lady named Sandy Cocks. She's one of those old bitchass stay-at-home moms that sits on her ass all day sending funny forwards instead of taking care of her kids. I delete all that shit. I keep deleting and deleting and deleting...and then something hits me.

The Username.

MonekyBallzPricness69 has a big surprise coming to her.

I freak out and log off the account and then enter my own.

Ooops a daisy.

I left the library at about 4pm. Someone asked me if there was something wrong with that kid under the thermostat. I kicked the kid and a bunch of blood spewed out. I said, "No."

"Oh, okay."

The Prince of Randomness?
03-28-2006, 03:56 AM
Your stories are very.. err... weird... and they all involve you....?

XxKanexX
03-29-2006, 06:45 AM
What the hell...

Your stories are extremely weird.

Pwnd
03-29-2006, 06:48 AM
You slit his throat.. with an exacto knife..

Very talented, I must say.

Arkanor
03-29-2006, 07:51 AM
Exacto knife? Dude, just snap his neck and claim he fell. Exacto-knives can be traced - broken necks if done properly are harder.

JiveTonto@Gmail.com
04-01-2006, 07:21 PM
how high were you droped from when you were a kid???