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Thread: The fading light

  1. #1
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    Default The fading light

    Okey dokey, whipped this up in like a half an hour.. Hope yeh like it.. ^.^

    It's a tragic love story, sorta. It pwns ^.^

    Code:
    A shadow passes o'er the land,
    The crows caw in delight.
    On Death's right hand we'll make a stand
    To save the fading light.
    
    Gnashing teeth and slashing claws 
    Await those standing nigh.
    By nature's laws, we stand and pause
    As Lion raised his voice on high.
    
    The drums call loud, the horns are blown
    As day comes close to night.
    Though overgrown, his mane, it shone
    Against the fading light
    
    As Lion walked to meet the men,
    He looked upon, with massive pride
    The Panther running, for with her
    His heart has always lied.
    
    The Lion ran toward the gang,
    As though he were under a spell
    The Lion sprang, and with a twang
    An arrow flew, the Lion fell.
    
    The others saw the Lion fall,
    He died for all to see
    But through it all, the Panther called
    "He gave his life for me."
    
    A shadow passes o'er the land, 
    The crows call in delight
    With pride he stands on Death's right hand
    Then walks into the fading light.
    ProphesyOfWolf

    If you liked it, please click the Eggs in my signature. ^.^

  2. #2
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    Default

    Come on, guys.. 34 views and no comments? RESPONSE!

    ^.^

  3. #3
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    Default

    i like the begin/end thing how the correlate, but, Narnia ripoff plox?

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    Default

    Lol no, not from Narnia. My nickname is Shadow Lion, and I was kinda weaving that in there. I guess you're right though; it could be mistaken for Narnia.

    ^.^

  5. #5
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    Default

    BUMPAGE. You guys should say something!

  6. #6
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    Default

    its aiight.

    In a few years you style might be polished enough to be published.

    Accept that the waters around you have grown.

  7. #7
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    Default

    i like it, although im not much of a poet the abab rhyming scheme and the repeated line seems good.


  8. #8
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    Default

    did ye write that all yerself

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