How to Be a Noob by TooManySitUps
So, you want to be a Noob eh? Whether you want to people to hate you, ignore you, not help you, not respect you, not vote for your membership application, or if you just want to be a Noob for fun, you've come to the right place!
Being a Noob is all about making bad posts. There are lots of ways to make bad posts, as you can see by the large amount of posts that shouldn't even had been made.
Not Searching First-A great way to be a special type of Noob, Lazy Noob, is to say something that has been said before, or ask a question that has been answered a million times before. Losers like Boreas say search first, or look at Stickied Tutorials, but the best way is to be Lazy Noob and not bother. Go ahead and post whatever crap comes to your mind, without thinking about it first, or putting in effort, then sit back and watch those losers flame you.
Double Posting- This way is all about ignoring something that is meant of you to use, the edit button.
Instead of making a post right another post, those non-Noob losers use the edit button to add stuff the first post, usually like this.
The patented Noob way is to make another post right after the other one. The trick is to pretend like you can't even see the edit button!This is the original post, blah blah.
Edit: This is what I wanted to add after. This is what would go in another post.
Posting in Wrong Forum- This way is also about ignoring, ignoring forum titles. This one is a little harder to do, because you have to ignore something that is clearly marked at the top of the page, but you can do it! There are a few common ways to accomplish this such as;
Posting problems about downloading and installing SRL in any forum other than 'SRL Installation and Downloading Problems'
Posting requests for scripts in any forum other than 'Script Request'
Posting in Wrong Thread/ Off Topic- This is related to the above, but is even more annoying and Noobish because it messes up the person who created the thread! A good way to do this is to ask for help on getting a script to work, on any random thread other than the thread of the script. Another example is making a request on a script thread. The more off it is, the more Noob Points you get.
Making a Generally Useless Post- My favorites are posting something obvious, or a simple 'I agree', or the ever popular 'lol'. If the thread would be pretty much the same or better without your post, its useless. The more pointless the post, the more Noob Points you get.
Being Immature- Seeing as this forum is mostly made of teenagers, a little immaturity is expected. So to really to get Noob Points, you gotta be really immature. Not thinking before posting, and disrupting threads helps with this.
Leet Speak- Now I don't mean abbreviations (why is that a long word?) like BTW, AFAIK, etc, I mean the using numbers and symbols as letters etc, that make it hard to read. The harder it is to read, the more Noob Points you get.
Spelling and Grammar- Using poor spelling and grammar gets you Lazy and Stupid Noob Points, because it shows a lack of effort in posting well. A few mistakes here and there won't get you any, but if it's really hard to read, you get lots!
Flaming- Constructive criticism, and arguing with points don't count, but 'dood you suck!' gets you major Noob Points. Also, general being an ass and pissing people off (especially well respected people) will help.
Leeching- Not everyone scripts, some people just test and give reports, that won't get you Noob Points. You get Noob Points by refusing to try to learn to script by looking at tuts in the tutorial section, and then asking for help with a simple problem that you could have fixed yourself if you had just read a little.
Complaining/Demanding-This is like mega leeching, which is why you get extra Noob Points! You can do this by complaining about free scripts not working. You get even more Noob Points if it's a simple problem that you could have fixed if you weren't a leeching Noob. The other way is demanding/begging that someone write you a good script. Requesting a script nicely, especially one that hasn't been requested before, and in the Script Request section, gets you no points, because it helps scripters who don't have an idea of what to write. The less detailed, and the more like 'make me a macro that gets me muny pl0x!', the more Noob Points you get.
Member Apps- Submitting bad membership applications that are an automatic no is a great way to rack up Noob Points. Ways to this include, submitting an app with no script, submitting an app as soon as you register (or less than 5 posts), and submitting a really crappy script with out getting feedback first in the scripting help forum or in the free scripts forum. You get mega Noob Points by submitting a script that you copied from somewhere else, as an added bonus, yohojo will pwn you, and you will probably never ever be accepted! You used to be able to get Noob Points by applying too often, however that loser Dankmess or something made it so that you can only post once a month. Now if you really want Noob Points, whatever you do, don't read that tutorial How to Become an SRL Member by Boreas, that dude is full of crap.
New Members- Don't worry, believe it or not, you can still earn Noob Points as an SRL Member. This can be done in 2 main ways. The first being acting like your hot stuff, acting like you are suddenly better than non-members, or just as good as members that have been around longer, or the next SCAR or SRL developer. The second way is posting in member applications, without waiting about a week to read how experienced voters do it. You can either over or under estimate an application, and the further off you are, the more Noob Points you get!
That's about all I think of for now. Follow this guide and you'll be Super Noob in no time!
-TooManySitUps