Results 1 to 20 of 20

Thread: The truth of relationships?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Right now? Chair.
    Posts
    8,488
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Quoted
    12 Post(s)

    Default The truth of relationships?

    Jealousy has been explored and researched through the centuries.


    What is it? How does it affect our daily lives? I ask myself...


    "Romantic jealousy is here defined as a complex of thoughts, feelings, and actions which follow threats to self-esteemand/or threats to the existence or quality of the relationship, whenthose threats are generated by the perception of a real or potential attraction between one's partner and a (perhaps imaginary) rival."


    So is it just during relationships? What is meant by a relationship? A threat to the existence or quality...


    The existence of the relationship... what about the existence of the possibility of a relationship? Is it possible to feel jealous over something you don't have? Wouldn't that be envy?


    Envy "occurs when a person lacks another's (perceived) superior quality, achievement, or possession and either desires it or wishes that the other lacked it."


    But human behaviour can get so much more complicated...

    What if it is a threat to the existence of the other person's feelings towards you? Or does this estabilish some kind of relationhip? Or the perception of one?


    So if you aren't in a relationship, but still do not want the other person to have feelings for someone else, do you love this person? Are you jealous or just envious?


    Or is it still a relationship? Although you do not share the physical actions with the person anymore, is it still a relations game where you're still playing? The relationship is still going on, only at a completly different level?


    "jealousy is always born with love; it does not always die with it." So what does it mean? You no longer love but still want the other person?


    When in love nothing matters, mistakes are forgiven, forgotten and over-looked. When loving all mistakes are a knife to the heart.


    So what if you're in love and loving? Does it hurt but you overcome it? Wouldn't you do that if you just loved anyway?


    But what is love? No one can be forced or force themselves into being in love, nor getting over it. But to love someone?


    Couples have gotten married without ever knowing each other and grown to love. You love your friends. You love your parents, your siblings. So you can grown to love someone.


    And if love is one of the strongest emotions ever, it only seems fit that hate be the opposite of love. But is it really?


    Is hate not just resentful love? If you hate, you love, because the feeling is too intense to not be a sort of love.


    Could you ever hate a complete stranger? No; You might dislike him or her due to your own personal stereotypes; But you can hate a former lover. You can only hate those who were a big part of your life, those who have a place in your heart.


    And when someone conquers a place, does it ever really go away? If walking down the street ten years later you bump into one of your ex's how would you feel? Run from them? Be awkward? Immediately kick off with a great conversation?


    When you shared something so deep with someone, why would you not share more? You once trusted this person to handle your secrets, your fears. Are you affraid they will mishandle them now, or are you glad to share them as you know this person will only want the best for you as you left them memories to remember?


    So what is love? The complete acceptance of another, faults and qualities? And what do you do about the faults? Attempt to help the other person improve them, or just deal with them?


    If you attempt to help the other person, are you accepting them? Or trying to change them so they'll suit you? And is this a selfish or a selfless act?


    What about being in love? Is it a feeling of extra good? Dizzy thoughts? The complete want of just holding the other person? Is it a bubble? Or does being in love get you into a bubble?



    And when this bubble bursts, what do you find yourself with? Love?


    And can you be in love with a friend? Love your friend so much you crave for their company?


    But if you can be in love and love a friend, what makes it a couple? The exclusivity of emotions is definitely not it, as you share love amongst several people. It is not the sexual acts, as they alone do not make a couple. Is it trust? You trust others as well tho.


    So what really is a couple? Is it a mixture of feelings, trust, the sharing?

    Or... is it the fact that you know you can rely on the other person. Would this not be the most rewarding thing? You know you have someone to rely on, and so does the other person?


    Maslow’s hierarchy of needs estabilishes priorities to achieve in life, and you can not move up to the upper step of the hierarchy without having first fullfilled those below. First comes Breathing, water, food, sex, sleep, homeostasis and excretion. The next level includes security of body, employment, resources, morality, family, health and propriety. Further up come the levels of Love, Esteem and Self-Actualization.


    So what is love? The completion to these levels that whomever it may be brings you. The more the other person completes you, the more love you feel towards them. The more you complete them, the more they love you.


    And so, love, is the completion of one another.



    ~RM

    I & I know Zion. It is in the spirit, body and mind of every one of us
    RMouse(obj: TMSIObject): boolean;

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Melbourne, Australia
    Posts
    2,240
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Quoted
    11 Post(s)

    Default

    Did you write all that up by yourself?
    Click here to find out how to get full screen without members! | Click here to check out my Ultimate Bitmap Tutorial! Edited to work with Simba! |

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Right now? Chair.
    Posts
    8,488
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Quoted
    12 Post(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by cycrosism View Post
    Did you write all that up by yourself?
    Except for what was quoted, yes.

    ~RM

    I & I know Zion. It is in the spirit, body and mind of every one of us
    RMouse(obj: TMSIObject): boolean;

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    2,766
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Quoted
    37 Post(s)

    Default

    What question of these 9001 do you want us to answer ?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    4,163
    Mentioned
    9 Post(s)
    Quoted
    19 Post(s)

    Default

    Yea I dont see the main question of this thread...looks like something you wrote up when high one day lol

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Right now? Chair.
    Posts
    8,488
    Mentioned
    3 Post(s)
    Quoted
    12 Post(s)

    Default

    Haha, how about what is love?

    ~RM

    I & I know Zion. It is in the spirit, body and mind of every one of us
    RMouse(obj: TMSIObject): boolean;

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    7,805
    Mentioned
    5 Post(s)
    Quoted
    3 Post(s)

    Default

    Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me. No more.
    Writing an SRL Member Application | [Updated] Pascal Scripting Statements
    My GitHub

    Progress Report:
    13:46 <@BenLand100> <SourceCode> @BenLand100: what you have just said shows you 
                        have serious physchological problems
    13:46 <@BenLand100> HE GETS IT!
    13:46 <@BenLand100> HE FINALLY GETS IT!!!!1

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    1,071
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    1 Post(s)

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Inside the Matrix...yes it has me, and it has you too.
    Posts
    1,896
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Rasta Magician View Post
    Haha, how about what is love?

    ~RM
    Scientifically, it is a chemical response from the brain linked to a person that suits your wants and needs, and it is meant for reproduction purposes.

    But science can't always explain everything.

    In my opinion, it is the want to have someone you can open yourself up to, and trust fully. It is an attraction of the inner person, not of the flesh. It is, as you said, the completion of one another. Fueled by jealousy at first, love grows, and keeps on growing. True love will last forever, in this world and whatever afterlife you believe in. Some would also argue that love is pain, and i do not disagree. But i do believe that in the end, no matter how much pain you go through, you will be rewarded, and the rewards will be great, for both you and your love. Love also is life, because some people couldn't not live without love. Love is what fuels (my) life. Without love, life would seem meaningless, and some would not want to go one living. Life without love can lead to depression, and in the end, death. Love is also what separates the human species from the animals. Take an un-neutered dog for example; he tries to hump everything in sight - other dogs, trees, human legs - but never do you see a dog in love, at least i haven't.

    In conclusion, love is life - life is love. You can not have either without each other.
    NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    1,673
    Mentioned
    1 Post(s)
    Quoted
    9 Post(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by bionicle1800 View Post
    Love is also what separates the human species from the animals. Take an un-neutered dog for example; he tries to hump everything in sight - other dogs, trees, human legs - but never do you see a dog in love, at least i haven't.
    I'm sure dogs love. And a dog is just one type of animal, what about swans, they have one partner throughout their whole life, so I'm sure animals love too. I'm sure an animal has feelings and emotions too.

    And love is too unique to each person to give it a definition. Depending on who you ask, you will always get a different interpretation of what love is or should be.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    NC, USA.
    Posts
    4,429
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    4 Post(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by bionicle1800 View Post
    But science can't always explain everything.
    Oh gawd, remove that before Yakman comes!


    imo: When you want some one sexually, I think you subconsciously make up reasons why you want them, other than sexual reasons.. This is love.
    Quote Originally Posted by irc
    [00:55:29] < Guest3097> I lol at how BenLand100 has become noidea
    [01:07:40] <@BenLand100> i'm not noidea i'm
    [01:07:44] -!- BenLand100 is now known as BenLand42-
    [01:07:46] <@BenLand42-> shit
    [01:07:49] -!- BenLand42- is now known as BenLand420
    [01:07:50] <@BenLand420> YEA

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Inside the Matrix...yes it has me, and it has you too.
    Posts
    1,896
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by noidea View Post
    imo: When you want some one sexually, I think you subconsciously make up reasons why you want them, other than sexual reasons.. This is love.
    ^this be called an infatuation
    NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Banville
    Posts
    3,914
    Mentioned
    12 Post(s)
    Quoted
    98 Post(s)

    Default

    Relationships are pointless.
    The jealous temper of mankind, ever more disposed to censure than
    to praise the work of others, has constantly made the pursuit of new
    methods and systems no less perilous than the search after unknown
    lands and seas.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    the middle of know-where
    Posts
    1,308
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    1 Post(s)

    Default

    +1 for Rasta Magician & Bionicle1800

    Here is something that I heard a while back. I thought that it epitomized on what it means to love and what a relationship is. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTyV6wmm_B4

    "Love is two people coming together and giving all of themselves to each other forever." Relationship: companionship, commitment, friendship, loyalty, passion, affection, sacrifice: physically, emotionally, & spiritually ~ Rob Bell - when one part of what a relationship truly is has been removed or not allowed, that ...relationship cannot last. It must be built upon emitional, spiritual, and physical attraction/bonding.
    Last edited by anonymity; 12-22-2009 at 02:14 AM.
    On vacation in NeverLand,
    Code:
    typedef int bool;
    enum { false, true };

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Banville
    Posts
    3,914
    Mentioned
    12 Post(s)
    Quoted
    98 Post(s)

    Default

    Except it's not really forever, 'cause they're gonna die sometime.
    The jealous temper of mankind, ever more disposed to censure than
    to praise the work of others, has constantly made the pursuit of new
    methods and systems no less perilous than the search after unknown
    lands and seas.

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Inside the Matrix...yes it has me, and it has you too.
    Posts
    1,896
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by R0b0t1 View Post
    Except it's not really forever, 'cause they're gonna die sometime.
    So i'm guessing you don't believe in an afterlife..or finding each other in your next lives...
    NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN NYAN

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    818
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

    He defines love pretty well, imo.

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Posts
    580
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    I hate josh so much right now

    EDIT. http://www.laddertheory.com

    "A woman's test is material. A man's test is a woman...if a man could fuck in a cardboard box, he wouldn't buy a house." - Rabbi Dave Chappelle.
    Last edited by Cigue; 12-21-2009 at 10:47 PM.
    I don't check this place often, sorry.

    Currently working on - Software Engineering degree. Thank you SRL for showing me the one true path

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    South East England
    Posts
    2,906
    Mentioned
    2 Post(s)
    Quoted
    8 Post(s)

    Default

    Nice to see you still writing. You need to be on MSN more, we don't talk as much.
    Jus' Lurkin'

  20. #20
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    22
    Mentioned
    0 Post(s)
    Quoted
    0 Post(s)

    Default

    My rep probably doesn't count for anything as I'm new to the site, but +rep anyway. Really thoughtful and deep post. If only more people knew what love really meant, there'd definitely be a lot less fighting in the world, and maybe we would begin to understand each other.

    I don't think it helps that we have made the one plant that can help us with love illegal. A natural herb that can turn the most selfish of people into loving caring individuals who only seek to live to make other peoples' lives better, is still treated like a poison, and while we are urged away from it we are pushed towards alcohol, the opposite in my opinion, the drug that can do so much to destroy relationships, friendships, and love itself.

    I think that goes for love as a whole though, the world spends too much time fighting over petty things, trying to shape the world to their own "perfect" picture, without stopping to think for a moment that maybe that picture is ugly in everyone else's eyes. If we all stopped to think, and understood that we are all different, we all have good qualities, and we all have our weaknesses, but we are all living breathing souls and we should accept each other as humans and not judge. A man in the street might shout an insult at you and walk off, but instead of taking it upon yourself to judge him, or worse yet, to shout back or resort to violence, maybe we should all think for a moment, that man has obviously gone through some hardship that has meant he must try and make others feel bad in order to keep his own spirits up, give him a break, let him be, he is not hurting you but if it gives him a little happiness, then it is good.

    I think this Christmas we should all take some time to learn to understand each other. Offer forgiveness where it's necessary, and apologise and ask for forgiveness where you have done wrong. Forget money, material possessions and greed, and just concentrate on making yourself and those around you happy.

    In the words of the legendary Beatles, all you need is love.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •