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Thread: My Essay on Tone and Diction on "Death"

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    Default My Essay on Tone and Diction on "Death"

    Hello everyone, this essay is due by Tuesday at 6pm.(Central time) I was wondering if there are any English majors, or just anyone good with grammar/punctuation and what not. Werther this get's viewed or not i will be taking it to my University that has a Enlgish Tutoring room, where I can get someone to look through it and give me suggestions to make it better within a 24 Hour period.

    Well here it is hope u enjoy it.

    Note: its almost 4 pages long. I suggest only for people who enjoy reading, and this is Poetry.

    Try posting this in Word for a better view/read.

    Emily Dickinson and John Donne
    Emily Dickinson and John Donne from section 22, both express their views of death through complex poetry. Their differences in opinions stem from the fact that they come from contrasting generations. While one poet views death from a negative perspective, the other poet finds it easier to befriend death. I will closely examine the diction that attributes to the overall tone of both poems, and analyze their contrasting attitudes of death.
    In Emily Dickinson’s poem “Because I could not stop for Death” (603), Dickinson viewed death in a positive way and personifies death as a friendly being. When looking at through this poem, it’s hard to tell if the narrator is referring this poem to herself. After reading the first two verses she states, “He kindly stopped for me” (2) she implies that Death is of noble character. Dickinson’s choice of the word “kindly”, has a dramatic effect on this poem, and allows the reader to understand that she doesn’t view death as an atrocious entity. Continuing through the verses she then goes on to explain, “The Carriage held but just Ourselves- / and immortality” (3-4). By using the word “Ourselves”, it is evident that she is comfortable with death at that moment because she described them as an entity. The last sentence of the stanza puts emphasis on the word Immortality. This word could be the cause of her complacent feelings, because the reassurance of an afterlife may be comforting to her. We can also see that when he picks her up in the carriage that “Immortality” is beside him, as if Immortality is an individual. One can say that death can be playing a hoax on the person using his “kindly” manners so he/she can go with him. “And I had put away My labor and my leisure too,” (7) she says. This line affirming that she is ready to go, as she had set everything aside and putting her full devotion to death. The next line says, “For His Civility.”(8) This means that everything she put aside, because she was overwhelmed with death’s civility.
    Beginning in stanza three she begins to journey down a road. In the first two lines she states, “We passed the School, where Children strove / At Recess-in the Ring-” (9-10). Picturing this you can imagine all three characters passing by the school looking at the children play. Perhaps observing herself as a child and how she would play during recess at school. In the next line she articulates, “We passed the Fields of Gazing Grain-“(11) again taking from the first two lines, we can add that now they are passing by fields of gazing grain. I noticed how she uses “Fields” as plural, meaning more than one field that she passed by. This can be perceived as she passes by her life through adulthood. Finally with the last line of the stanza she says, “We passed the Setting Sun-“(12). On this last line we can see that they had passed the setting sun and we can imply that she is not afraid to go to the other side with death to live eternity. On stanza 4, the 3rd line she says, “For only Gossamer, my gown.” (15) This line is a big hint that she's going to other side or the other around with death and that she feels cold chills in her gown. This all makes sense as now this whole two stanza’s syndicates making it seem that it goes from life to death to eternity. On the following stanza she says “We paused before house that seemed a swelling of the ground / The Roof was clearly visible / The Cornice in the Ground-” (17-20) The house in this stanza replicates her grave because she says, “A Swelling of the Ground”, meaning the ground is ready for her. Finally in the last stanza it becomes clear that she is only imagining her death. “Since then-‘tis Centuries-and yet / Feels shorter than the Day / I first surmised the Horse’s Heads Were toward Eternity.” (21-24)she says. Perhaps several centuries have passed by, but at the same time she feels that the days “Feels shorter”. Notice how she uses feels, he goes from past to present. Meaning she only had a glimpse, of what to come. Thus reading this poem it is evident that she is not afraid of dying, but only comfortable with the fact of the way the cycle works. We can also compare this as in today society death is highly frowned upon, because people are terrified to experience death.
    In John Donne's “Death be no proud.” He articulates another point of view, observing him as nothing. In the second line he says “Mighty and dreadful, for thou art not so.” (2) Implying that death is merely nothing and that we should not think of him as a mighty being, but only as a weak figure. He backs this up by saying, “For those whom thou think’st thou dost overthrow.” (3) Even though death can kill all men, death shouldn’t feel proficient for his work. John simply taunts death by saying that he cannot kill him. He continues mocking him by saying “From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be, / Much pleasure, then from thee much more must flow, / And soonest our best men with thee do go, Rest of their bones, and soul’s delivery.”(5-8)(604). From line 5 we can see how he compares “rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be” indicating how death looks passive and no harm will be done which someone goes with death to the other side. This can be backed up by “Much pleasure” as it’s pleasurable to go with death, like his “best men” (7). “Rest of their bones, and soul’s delivery.” Meaning anyone death may take to the other side, would be pleasing because death himself is not to be petrified as he takes each soul elegantly. In the next 4 lines, Donne says, “Thou ar slave to fate, chance, kings, and desperate men, / And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell, / And poppy, or charms can make us sleep as well, / And better than thy stroke; why swell’st thou then?”(9-12). Death himself is displeased with the people who do die which are the ones to “fate, chance, kings, and desperate men.” Because there were people like this, death had no choice but to convey their death, implying he was more of a slave and had to do it. Those who tried to avoid there death by either fate, poison, or war, ended up denying deaths’ gratification of taking that person’s soul that he must renounce. Finally in the last 2 lines (13-14), Donne continues to mock death by saying even a person is, “One short sleep...” away from an everlasting paradise. Then stating that “death shall be no more;” meaning death will no longer have a point on living as “death, thou shalt die”. Death will eventually die because even if the one he wanted to take missed death’s fate, then death would no longer have a point on living. John Donne’s diction’s of choice in “Death by not proud” are hard to gain a meaning from. But with each line backed up by a previous line, it can easily be seen as death is no longer to be afraid of, but only an entity who will take your soul peacefully.
    Emily Dickson and John Donne’s views on death, were both different but fairly similar. Emily believes that death is natural. As it’s a cycle that everyone must go through, whether it was or wasn’t her time, she believed that death was a gentleman and living eternally was pleasant. John on the other hand mocks death, as he is nothing more but a weak entity that follows orders by chance or fate. He believed that death would die if the orders he followed did not go through the way planned, and those who died that were desperate man, death felt pity for them.

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    One quick question: Is it supposed to be formal or informal?
    I'm a scientist and not an English major, but I really enjoy English and sentence structure, I'd be glad to give my [biased] input.

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    I donno lol, my English prof, didn't ask it in a specific way. I'm just mainly looking for if i stayed on topic, makes sense, or grammar mistakes.

    Or any suggestions.

    I tried to post as attachment but my file was to big.

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    Dickinson viewed death in a positive way and personifies death as a friendly being. When looking at through this poem, it’s hard to tell if the narrator is referring this poem to herself.

    - When looking at through?
    - Transition needed between ideas so they don't feel disjointed [is that a word? xD]


    Continuing through the verses she then goes on to explain

    - May be able to be succinct by saying "Furthermore," in short


    it is evident that she is comfortable with death at that moment because she described them as an entity. The last sentence of the stanza puts emphasis on the word Immortality.

    - Transition if possible? Transitions in English essays can be a pain in the rear-end

    ===========

    Shall see what you think of the above, hopefully it's take as constructive criticism
    If all is well and I'm not missing anything I can continue on if you wish for me to.

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    You should always write in formal English. Also, I would highly suggest citing sources, even if it is just from a class text.

    On the note of formal English, please take out contractions and the like (it's -> it is).

    Just from skimming it, you need to watch your sentence fragments. For example, this:
    Notice how she uses feels, he goes from past to present. Meaning she only had a glimpse, of what to come.
    Should probably be something along these lines:
    The reader will note how Dickinson feels as she moves from past to present. Her intention is that she only had a glimpse of what is to come.
    The last sentence was the fragment, and the comma isolates a phrase for no reason. Just because you pause when you say it, does not entail that it needs a comma.

    E: Oh, use of second person is really frowned upon in most works. By saying ``Notice how she...'', you are implying the second person. Just as bad as actually saying, ``You notice how she....''
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    Woot thanks guys

    I corrected almost all mistakes before going to tutoring for the writing center. My tutor said my essay was very well written and I asked him if I should have written it more in a formal view, he said it didn't really matter at this point unless our professor really wanted it like that, but he said to try and write more like that in the future.

    He also said he enjoyed reading my essay, and he wants to read the book now from what i have said about it.

    I'm just wondering if any of you guys felt intrested in reading this poem after reading my essay? I did change that one line Nava, as my tutor caught that aswell, and he gave me a good example to change it too which i did. All my punctuation was corrected and alot of fragmented sentence's were too.

    Woot thanks guys i really appreciate the critism. I don't take it mean, I take it in a way to correct my self on errors that you guys have caught.

    Will be turning it in tomorrow, before 6. If any more suggestions that you may have caught that my tutor didn't in the Rough Draft posted above, please point them out.

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